The Grand Delusion




Who remembers that famous line "I am a sucker for love"  Well I am not. Naturally I believe in love, like most of us do, but you see, unlike a lot of general ideas, notions and beliefs, I have other ideas.
Don't get me wrong, I know how it feels to be in that special person's arms, how it feels to be embraced and caressed by that person. To hear their slow breathing, to perceive their unique yet confounding fragrance, to be touched by them in the least sensitive places of the human anatomy, yet feel so electrified by the gentlest perusal.
Yes, it is an amazing yet frightening emotion. Not many of us have ever known that feeling and the sad truth is that most of us will only get to feel that way a handful of times in our short existence.
Personally, I am still holding out hope against hope that I will be turned to a moron again. Yes, that's exactly what that emotion does to the human brain and mind. Yet, this time around, I am going to be a hardworking, brave and worthy moron.
It is funny how most people think by loving someone alone and been loved in return will magically turn their relationship into a fairy tale happily ever after. This may seem so in the initial stages of the relationship, until later on when  that "fire" and passion dies off and the ship hits the rocks.
As boring as it sounds, to make that relationship work, you must work and likewise your partner. Yes work, work to be a better person, and work to make your girl or guy a better person. I read a wonderful book "The five love languages by Gary Chapman (Singles version)" and I personally recommend every reader to get a copy. According to Gary, everyone got their special love languages whether it's gifts, compliments, words of appreciation etc.
So working for the success of that relationship really entails finding out what love languages your partner speaks best. You may also need to discover whatever languages you like best, for example some of us like gifts, some compliments, some support(moral, physical or otherwise) etc. Its your duty to figure out yours and that of your partner. 














Like people say, communication is key, not money like common notion. When you and partner starts speaking in similar wavelength, that relationship will only flourish.
Never delude yourself into thinking that you can have the similar kind of relationship we all see in movies and read in books. Those stuffs are just entertainment. True, some people even get to have more awesome and amazing relationships than the telenovelas, but everyone is different. Go for your expectations, and live out your own dreams.
My advice..trust one another, until given a reason to do otherwise. Always remember, to err is human and to forgive is divine.
Of course, nothing is ever plain and simple in this world. We must have heard of stories of people loving people that didn't feel the same way. Heck, we might have been in one or two situations ourselves. The advice here is to move on. Never delude yourselves into thinking that, that person will suddenly magically fall in love with you or rather that you can convince him or her to love you in return.
Probably the most important lesson of life is to love oneself first. Never degrade yourself into being in a prison for someone. Your happiness comes first and no prison is worth your happiness.
Lastly as an ode to this piece, love is sacrifice, love is hard, in the lay man's English, it is "suffer suffer", "difficult something", yet as you have always been told, love is worth it.








Written by: James H. Ikechukwu
Models: Tumminy
                Beejay


Photography by: FredShotit


James H. Ikechukwu is a young and passionate writer. When he is not writing, he is studying to be the best Nigerian Pharmacist (ever). In his free time, he enjoys football, chess, chatting with friends and reading stuffs.







Would you like to stay connected and get quotes that will inspire and motivate you?
Follow our instagram upage @JoyNgofaa'sblog








To stay connected and get notifications on new posts, be a darling and subscribe. Don't forget to share also.. Big thanks.







Comments

Anonymous said…
That was a lovely piece
But you mentioned something about
Language of love,as a human,are you meant to have just one language of love
because I think i don't think i have just
one
12 January 2019 at 14:40
Anonymous said…
I don't think***
12 January 2019 at 14:41
Anonymous said…
Some persons have more than one love language. It all depends on personality variation. I think if you read the book that was mentioned in the article, you'll understand better.
16 January 2019 at 07:45
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

BANANA, PINEAPPLE, MILK AND HONEY SMOOTHIE.

Image
Hello guys, here is a new and exciting way for you to enjoy your fruits. We all know how essential fruits are in our diet. They contain vitamins and minerals which build the body. Although am not a big fan of fruits (eyes rolling), fruit smoothie is a nice way of enjoying the fruits you don't really like as well as your favorite fruit. You can give your loved one a treat with banana, pineapple, milk and honey smoothie. Don't forget to treat yourself too😉. Let's get down with this. What you need (1) Banana (2) Pineapple (3) Milk (4) Honey Health Benefits of Ingredients . Banana Banana is one fruit I naturally love. Am sure you love banana too. I mean who wouldn't love banana? Its tasty and enriching. • Banana contains simple sugars like sucrose and fructose which replenish energy and revitalize the body. • Banana is also a good source of vitamin c. • It contains flavonoidpoly-phenolic antioxidants such as lutein, zeaxanthine, alpha and beta carotene albeit
Read more

INTERVIEW: "I got mature in mind at quite a young age"~Hillary Nwoziri

Image
The concept of luminary writing goes beyond just the impetus that drives the reader. Hillary Obinna Nwoziri, a profound luminary writer, and author of "The Voyager's Muse" opens up about himself in this exclusive interview with Miss Joy Ngofaa. Joy: Hi Hillary, tell us a little about yourself. Hillary: I'm from Imo State, the last of 5 children, and the last son too. Currently, I'm in the final lap of my second year in the University of Port Harcourt. I'm Studying Linguistics and Communication Studies. I love to write, sing, and sleep. I also love to travel and keep busy. Joy: That's interesting. So how did you begin your journey as a writer? Hillary: I've been writing since I was in primary school. I was one of the best essay and composition writers in my school. It continued till secondary school. At that time, I hadn't seen writing as a big deal (of course it is a big deal). I didn't see it as something I'll take on as
Read more

The SeeExpiryDate campaign was launched today 1st June 2017

Image
The SeeExpiryDate campaign was launched today (1st June 2017 ) by a team of thoughtful youths led by Miss Joy Ngofaa. Other members of the team are; Mr Ronald Kenneth Mr David Oti Miss Eunice Ufuoma Mr Moses .O. Miss Edikan Friday Miss Ibiso Abbey Mr Victor Okafor and Miss Sophia Chukunda The campaign is aimed at creating awareness on the importance of checking the expiry date of products before buying or using, as a way of improving health consciousness, since expired products might sometimes have deleterious effect on the human body. Expiry date according to CBC news is the date up to which a food/drug product maintains its microbiological, physical stability and nutrient/chemical content as declared on the label. Expiration dates on food/drug products are usually made paramount all over the world in order to keep users informed as it indicates the time frame during which the product is most suitable to be consumed. However, for food products, expiry dates on canned
Read more

Scars (Part 2)

Image
Continued from part 1.                                  If you missed part one, click    here I fear that I let them do it to me.  I fear that I gave them avenue to use me, to hurt me.  Deep down in my heart a voice says "no you didn't "      Bill says "no you didn't "      But it's obvious, isn't it?  After mum remarried when I turned fifteen,  that was when the self stabbings and cuttings started.  I think I gave them the cue.  Mum, a career woman was rarely at home. According to her,  she remarried for me. So that I can have a man figure in my life.  I was always left with mum's husband and my step brother.  That was when the blood began dripping and the smell began seeping out.  I bet they could smell it.    Dad,  as I had to call mum's husband,  raped me.  It didn't seem like a rape to me though. Somewhere in my mind I had anticipated it,  schemed and made the setup. And it seemed he had  walked into my trap,  even when h
Read more

Tasting tear drops (part 2)

Image
Continued from   part 1   Then one day she met Tom and they became friends. He was a junior and normally such friendships were short-lived because people begin to say things and you tend to think they are right. But not them, Tom didn't seem to care about what people said, and she didn't have friends so no one said anything to her. Tom was working wonders so we welcomed him into our family with open arms...dad absolutely adored him and so did I.            Their friendship blossomed into something beautiful and every weekend they ate at a particular Chinese restaurant. Tom bought her flowers every time he came to visit and soon they started talking about the future, I was thrilled and inspired, my depressed sister had finally found her Prince charming, and their love had finally transformed into something beautiful, oh, the power of love. They both graduated from college and began dating, she quickly found a job and so did he. Marriage talks were on everyone's mind and fi
Read more

How to make cucumber paste

Image
Hello guys,                     In this post I'll be showing you how to make cucumber paste. But first let us look at some of the benefits of cucumber. • Cucumber has the ability to fade dark spots, and also reduces dark circles around the eyes. • Cucumber can be used to treat sun burn. The cooling effect of cucumber acts as a soothing relief on sunburn which gradually reduces the sunburn. • Cucumber can be used to treat freckles. • Cucumber can be used to reduce eye bag, and reduce water retention around the eye area and make the eye appear less puffy. How to make cucumber paste • Get fresh mature cucumber. • cut it into cubes and remove the seeds. • Take off the greeny back, and put in a plate. • Marsh it with a fork or any other convenient device. • Your paste is ready. Refrigerate to preserve it. Thank you for reading this, I hope it was helpful. Please leave your comments and questions or suggestions below. Keep checking up for more tips. Email: joyngofaa@yahoo.
Read more

INTERVIEW: I have found the one~JustinMuzik

Image
Here in an interview with Miss Joy Ngofaa, Port Harcourt gospel artiste JustinMuzik opens up about his musical journey. Joy : Hello Mr Justin, tell us a little about yourself.  Justin : My name is Nweze Justin Barisua Anyekere. Am from Rivers State. Joy : What was growing up like? Justin : I grew up with my mum in Port Harcourt, then we moved to Abia state. I attended Akuete Nursery and Primary School there, before we moved to Okirika where I attended Secondary school. I later moved to Ahoada because of a war in Okirika at that time until the year 2000 when I enrolled in Rivers State Polytechnic. After obtaining a diploma in accounting, I went further to study Linguistics and Communication in University of Port Harcourt, which I finished some years ago. Joy : What about your music background? Justin : I have been into music since I was young. I lead an acapella  group as a teenager. And was appointed music director of the JCCF (Joint Christian Campus
Read more

Tasting tear drops (part 1)

Image
Tomorrow, it'd be second August again and Mary will go out to China town. She'd buy herself some beautiful Chinese lanterns and all sorts of decor she can remember. Each year, they become less because of her amnesia. Then she'd stop by her favourite Chinese restaurant and buy everyone sushi. Dad will help take out everything in the garage and she'll set up her decorations, it had become some kind of ritual, one that only both of them understood. She'd set up dinner table for two and she'd place two seats. When the clock strikes nine in the night and the star lights are in place, for some bizarre reason, there are always star lights in the sky on the second of August. Its as if even God understands that the night lights are important to her. She'd dress up in a beautiful dinner gown and come downstairs, and dad as always, will take her by the hand and walk her to the front door. Once she was outside, she'd hug an imaginary figure and point to the sky.
Read more

Diary Series; Miriam's Diary

Image
It's August 15th I see a lady, she looks frail and sorrowful lying helplessly in a hospital bed. I could tell by her countenance that she is drenched in depression. I was prompted to go to her. I held her hand and said "Jesus loves you ma'am" she smiles at me; a warm and charming smile. I smile back. I give her a hug, then spend more time with her. We chat a little. I lead her to Christ and hand her a tract. She promises to read it. She has cancer on her left breast. She would recieve chemotherapy.  I guess I should introduce myself. My name is Miriam. I'm five. I'll be six 12 days from today. I have cancer too. My doctor says I have 8 days more to live. I pray I see my birthday. Peradventure I'll grow taller, or even bigger. They call me little Mira. I know I'm not just a little girl; I'm a big king right on the inside. I'm confined to the hospital bed. My pain has intensified. The wounds and sores have increased. Most times
Read more

My night time poem

Image
Silence sweeps the sky And birds hide in the dark The stars like diamond dazzle And shooting lights they sparkle The wind it sweeps the sun and moonlight fills the heaven The stars shine all night long Just as the clock strikes seven The trees dance to the wind And grasses bow in awe The crickets chirp in the field As fireflies astound all Now your eyes are heavy Just as your eyelids quiver Shhhhh listen dearie, To a night time poem that's mine
Read more